textualdeviance: (Default)
Last post reminded me of all the major stressors I've dealt with in the last 1-2 years:

-Job/career stagnation
-Two pets dying
-Two surgeries (and two more upcoming--part 2 & 3 of the dental surgery)
-Adoption prep and related somewhat-tight finances and partial house re-orging.
-Ongoing health issues of various sorts, including discovering that my hearing is going
-Major disappointment with the chorus thing
-Family drama
-Shitty politics (seriously: seeing how openly racist/sexist/homophobic/ableist/etc. people can be is unbelievably awful)
-Helping M manage his own job ick

There's been good stuff, too, of course: travel (though that has stress of its own), finishing my novels, etc. And I've kept myself together by diving into fandom/gaming stuff. Still ... no wonder I'm so fucking exhausted and burned out. Maybe it makes sense that all I want to do this weekend is hole up in bed and sleep. Maybe read a little. I don't think I've really given myself enough free time to just heal from all this.
textualdeviance: (ASLWTF)
According to my brain while in dreamland, the most awesome things, ever are (in no particular order):

1. Friendly sex with celebrities or people I know (occasionally people I haven't ever thought about that way, which is slightly disturbing; never quite knew I had the hots for Ian McKellen. Thanks, subconscious!)
2. Food, and large quantities thereof, like giant buffet tables and huge candy stores.
3. Running, biking, jumping, flying, swimming, skating--all with superhuman strength and velocity.
4. Beating the everloving snot out of people who annoy me or who have hurt me or someone I love.
5. Cuddling, caring for and loving small, helpless creatures or children.
6. Singing, playing an instrument, composing--all with virtuoso ability.


7. Desperately trying to find an appropriate place in which to relieve myself, and coming up short. Usually this manifests in finding public bathrooms with no privacy or broken stall doors or something like that.



There are other recurring dreams I have--some interesting ones, some horrifying ones--but these are the most common. IDGI.
textualdeviance: (ASLWTF)
K's about to become a grandmother. She turns 40 in July.

Her 22-year-old kid--my goddaughter--is due in Feb.

The idea of my pseudosister having a grandkid before I've even had a kid? Is messing with my head.

Granted that K started early--her first pregnancy was at 15--but still.

ETA: Some navel gazing on this )
textualdeviance: (Bridal Illusions)
It just occurred to me: I know basically nothing about mainstream het female culture.

I was just thinking that virtually all of the friends I've had in the last ~20 years have been some variety of queer or non-muggle. The only thing I know about average straight women is what I get from the media. I mean... I know some straight women, sure (hi!), but most of them are fandom/alterna sorts and therefore don't really do the mainstream girl thing themselves.

K is probably the only more-or-less "normal" straight woman I know, and that's different because she's practically my sister, and she's more than a bit of a tomboy anyway.

Most of the guys I know are queer or geeky, too, but I've known a lot more average straight men than women, and therefore their culture isn't as much of an unknown.

No wonder I feel so weird when I'm forced to have social conversations with straight women. They're basically an alien species to me.
Apr. 6th, 2010 09:39 am


textualdeviance: (ASLWTF)
I may have had a dream that involved John Barrowman and zombies. And we had to sing to the zombies to keep them at bay.


Also, I've had 3.5 hours of sleep, because my stupid ass stayed up too late making a vid.


Mar. 20th, 2010 03:33 pm


textualdeviance: (skwirls)
WTF body? )
textualdeviance: (ASLWTF)
First, it was a spider the size of a quarter crawling on my arm as I was trying to put on my bra this morning (I made a noise that instantly removed my butch cred. Sigh...)

Then it was the massive bobcat casually loping across the street and over the fence into someone's yard as we left the neighborhood on the way to work.

Also, there are bunnies. Didn't see any today, but they're out there.

I appear to have moved into the boonies.


Off to the apartment for a bit to babysit furniture rental people. Then a few more hours at work, then I'm free for a few days while the parentals are here. Well, free being a relative term, given the amount of work that will be involved!


textualdeviance: (Default)

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