Writer's Block: The second time around

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Technically M and I did this, but it wasn't a long gap. We'd been deliberately platonic friends for a few months and then sort of stumbled into dating the week after Christmas 1994, and then I told him I wasn't ready to get serious, yet. (It had only been a month since I split with my ex, and I really needed time to myself!)

He dumped me and went off with some other chick, and I moped around in utter misery for the next month. And then we magically hooked back up again once I realized I was being an idiot for passing him up, and have been together ever since.

Truthfully speaking, I still feel like we really did rush things, and even though it turned out well, I did carry a lot of resentment for a while because I felt like he should've been more understanding about my need to be more casual after ending a seven-year relationship. If he really did think I was The One, it wouldn't have killed him to cool his heels for another several months while I got myself together, instead of pushing me to make a commitment before I was ready.

But we were both young and slightly nuts then and things have certainly worked out for the best, so even though our relationship started weird (though not as weird as our wedding was!), I'm just glad it started, and that that initial stumble didn't kill it for good.

And people wonder why I'm a bit of hermit sometimes

Going along as normal, enjoying my day, and something reminds me of that whole bit about how I'm a second-class citizen (if not further down the list) because I'm fat.

Do people even listen to themselves? People who wouldn't dream of such casual offensiveness toward other oppressed minorities just toss that shit out there without a second thought.

Clue: Even if it's directed at yourself, going off in a fat-negative way only reinforces the idea that every fat person is somehow bad. When you bitch about the size of your thighs or the fact that you've gained five pounds, or how you really shouldn't have had that cupcake because you might "blow up," you're adding to the overall cultural message that tells me that I ought to just go off myself so I stop offending other people with my body. You're not just getting down on yourself, you're furthering the idea that it's OK to treat me and others like me like absolute shit.

We get that abuse enough from pop culture and the zillion-dollar diet industry. We don't need it from people who should know better.

Stop. It.