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textualdevianceWell, this feels weird. I just sent my resume in to a couple of temp agencies. It'll be the first time I've done the workaday thing in almost 7 years.
Technically speaking, I don't really need to do it, but having the extra cash to help pay for school and vacations and some other projects, and put some extra money in our savings account would be useful. The money that comes in from the advertising on my sites really only pays for the hosting costs and stuff for the sites (and sometimes not quite even that) so I really should do something else. And as things are slowing down a bit with those, and will be at a near-standstill over the summer, it's probably good for me to do something else other than sit around and play video games and masturbate.
The frustrating thing about all of this is that it's been so long since I had a paycheck-type job, that I don't really have a specific set of skills and references and all that jazz to where people can easily stuff me into a job. I mean, any idiot can run a copier and answer a phone and do data entry. I've done the biological office equipment stuff before, and I can do it again. And that's probably what I'll be doing with the temp assignments. But that stuff really doesn't pay all that much simply because any literate human being can do it. The only other official work experience type stuff I have is a zillion years of call center/customer service type stuff, and I'll cut off an arm and eat it before I ever do that again. I would much rather sit in a cube in a corner and type in paper orders for fish guts (my last temp job) than talk to bitchy people on the phone again, even if it pays less.
This is why I'm getting my journo degree, though. I'm tired of the only things I'm technically qualified to earn a paycheck for (as in, stuff I have actual quantifiable experience doing) being things that are considerably below my mental abilities. There are a thousand other jobs I could do, with a week or so of training, but I don't have a little blurb on my resume saying I can officially do them.
The biggest thing that's been in my way in the last several years is how sick I've been. One of the reasons I can't hold a full time job is because I never know when I'm going to be laid up for a week or more. That's what's prevented me from pursuing a performing career, too. Two to three bouts with the flu every year, several weeks of half bleeding to death with attendant anemia, no energy, no physical strength, several days where I just can't get out of bed, etc. And I never know when I'm going to have a bad day, so I can't make commitments. So that's why my "job" per se, for the last several years has been various types of freelancing. Stuff where I can set my own schedule, more or less. And if I have a bad day, I just don't have to go down the hall to the computer. I don't have to call some evil pointy-haired boss and tell him that I can't come in to work because I just left a puddle of blood on my bathroom floor.
Now that I'm finally starting to get that stuff sorted out, I'm doing better, though. That's why I can manage to go back to school, now. The combination of the ADD meds, the Wellbutrin, the CPAP and my self-designed progesterone regimen (fuck you, doctors, I figured it out myself) has almost gotten me functional. I'm probably at about 70% of a normal human being now, instead of about the 40% I was before. It's been cool. I'm still tired and sore, and I still have no immune system to speak of, but I at least feel like doing more than sleeping and sitting around now.
The other roadblock to working, of course, is that I would go completely insane if I had to work full time in an office or a store or a factory somewhere for any length of time. I wouldn't be able to hold the job, even though I could do it. I don't know how people do it. I realize that office buildings and retail sales and assembly lines make the world go round, but I honestly would set fire to my cube and then myself if I had to do that. I'm Lloyd Dobler, man. Only I can't kickbox, either.
The American dream-- a steady job, a house in the burbs, 2.3 kids, a golden retriever and a minivan and a barbecue every other Sunday-- is a nightmare for me. I can't imagine anything more horrible. Only problem is that it's hard to get by if you don't buy into that, unless you're uncommonly gifted in some area or look like a supermodel. Making a living, for most people, requires stuffing yourself into that mold and pretending to be like everyone else. Barf.
But I guess I can fake it for a little while. It's annoying that I have no way of making even half of what Mike does merely because I don't have special little keywords on my resume that get me paid like a human being, but I suppose a little pocket change is worth selling myself out for a few days here and there.
Technically speaking, I don't really need to do it, but having the extra cash to help pay for school and vacations and some other projects, and put some extra money in our savings account would be useful. The money that comes in from the advertising on my sites really only pays for the hosting costs and stuff for the sites (and sometimes not quite even that) so I really should do something else. And as things are slowing down a bit with those, and will be at a near-standstill over the summer, it's probably good for me to do something else other than sit around and play video games and masturbate.
The frustrating thing about all of this is that it's been so long since I had a paycheck-type job, that I don't really have a specific set of skills and references and all that jazz to where people can easily stuff me into a job. I mean, any idiot can run a copier and answer a phone and do data entry. I've done the biological office equipment stuff before, and I can do it again. And that's probably what I'll be doing with the temp assignments. But that stuff really doesn't pay all that much simply because any literate human being can do it. The only other official work experience type stuff I have is a zillion years of call center/customer service type stuff, and I'll cut off an arm and eat it before I ever do that again. I would much rather sit in a cube in a corner and type in paper orders for fish guts (my last temp job) than talk to bitchy people on the phone again, even if it pays less.
This is why I'm getting my journo degree, though. I'm tired of the only things I'm technically qualified to earn a paycheck for (as in, stuff I have actual quantifiable experience doing) being things that are considerably below my mental abilities. There are a thousand other jobs I could do, with a week or so of training, but I don't have a little blurb on my resume saying I can officially do them.
The biggest thing that's been in my way in the last several years is how sick I've been. One of the reasons I can't hold a full time job is because I never know when I'm going to be laid up for a week or more. That's what's prevented me from pursuing a performing career, too. Two to three bouts with the flu every year, several weeks of half bleeding to death with attendant anemia, no energy, no physical strength, several days where I just can't get out of bed, etc. And I never know when I'm going to have a bad day, so I can't make commitments. So that's why my "job" per se, for the last several years has been various types of freelancing. Stuff where I can set my own schedule, more or less. And if I have a bad day, I just don't have to go down the hall to the computer. I don't have to call some evil pointy-haired boss and tell him that I can't come in to work because I just left a puddle of blood on my bathroom floor.
Now that I'm finally starting to get that stuff sorted out, I'm doing better, though. That's why I can manage to go back to school, now. The combination of the ADD meds, the Wellbutrin, the CPAP and my self-designed progesterone regimen (fuck you, doctors, I figured it out myself) has almost gotten me functional. I'm probably at about 70% of a normal human being now, instead of about the 40% I was before. It's been cool. I'm still tired and sore, and I still have no immune system to speak of, but I at least feel like doing more than sleeping and sitting around now.
The other roadblock to working, of course, is that I would go completely insane if I had to work full time in an office or a store or a factory somewhere for any length of time. I wouldn't be able to hold the job, even though I could do it. I don't know how people do it. I realize that office buildings and retail sales and assembly lines make the world go round, but I honestly would set fire to my cube and then myself if I had to do that. I'm Lloyd Dobler, man. Only I can't kickbox, either.
The American dream-- a steady job, a house in the burbs, 2.3 kids, a golden retriever and a minivan and a barbecue every other Sunday-- is a nightmare for me. I can't imagine anything more horrible. Only problem is that it's hard to get by if you don't buy into that, unless you're uncommonly gifted in some area or look like a supermodel. Making a living, for most people, requires stuffing yourself into that mold and pretending to be like everyone else. Barf.
But I guess I can fake it for a little while. It's annoying that I have no way of making even half of what Mike does merely because I don't have special little keywords on my resume that get me paid like a human being, but I suppose a little pocket change is worth selling myself out for a few days here and there.
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Re: Wow
As I explained in the post, a lot of the reason I haven't had a "job" per se is because I've been very sick, and trying to maintain a 40 hour a week hard-line schedule just wouldn't have been possible. I need the flexibility of being able to make my own schedule. Even when I get my journo degree I'll probably just be freelancing. Mike understands all this, of course. He knows very well that if the circumstances were reversed that I'd have no qualms supporting him. We don't keep score like that. We're together because we want to be, not because we each have some sort of job to do. I don't "pay" for his supporting me by doing housework or anything, and he doesn't "pay" for my companionship by bringing home a paycheck. We both just do what needs to be done within our abilities for the sake of having a roof over our heads and the needs of day-to-day living done. We have a roomie who helps out with stuff, too.
He doesn't have a degree, btw, just a lot of experience in his field.